Words

Pay no heed to words uttered in frustration.
Pay no heed to words mouthed in anger.
Pay no heed to words said in vengeance.
But all the more, take no note of words said in hatred.
For these words come not from the heart, but from the savage beast that is human nature.
Do not read too much into these types of words for they mean nothing.
For these words are said in moments of spite.

Listen to words said in sorrow.
Listen to words that come from the broken hearted.
Listen to words of care.
Listen to words of concern.
Listen to the voice of reason.
Take heed of words regarding friendships.
Take heed of words regarding forgiveness.
Take heed and listen to words asking for forgiveness.
But most of all listen to words said out of love.
For these words, be they said out loud, be they uttered in silence, are words from the heart.
For these words come from God.
For God is love.
These words, most times, ask for you to be chrst-like.
These words, most often, ask for you to care.
These words, All of the time, ask for you to love.

Words uttered in love, are the most powerful.
For they convey a message, that touches the listener.
At times, words of love are harsh.
At times, words of love are painful.
At times, words of love are quiet.
At times, words of love need not be said to be heard.

Take heed and act on words of love,
For the action taken can bring warmth to the hearts of many.
For the action taken can bring joy to the sad.
It can bring love to the loveless.
It can bring light to those in darkness.
It can bring warmth to the cold.

Ignore not the voice of reason.
Ignore not the voice of love.
to ignore these voices, is to ignore the voices of the needy.
to ignore these voices, is to ignore the voices of those most in need of love.

I ask of you to listen to these words.
I ask of you to ponder upon these words.
For i say these words out of concern.
For i say these words out of love.

Take heed and listen.
Take action if needed.
That is all i ask of you.
Good night.

Its about time a actually start thinking before i start typing.
i usually just let my fingers walk on the key board and then stuff comes out.
i really should start thinking.
for those of you who know, yeah i edited the last entry. took out something that i shouldn't even have put there in the first place.

I typed that in frustration.
It's things i don't mean.
I cooled down, and realized i shouldn't have put it there. and before i managed to change it.
Well, chance played a cruel trick on me.
If you're reading this...
ignore it k?
I do want us to be friends.
And i'm not blaming you for anything.
really i'm not. i do want us to be friends....
sorry....

The stark realization that someone couldn't care less if i lived or died has just pushed me over the edge.....
My feelings for her are officially dead.
jump for joy, whistle whatever..... They've died.....

No i don't hate her.... no i don't dislike her.
i still want her as a friend, if nothing else.
We started as friends, i hope we can go back to that.
It'd be really sad if we couldn't even be friends.

You'd expect a certain amount of relief from having feelings that died...
instead i feel a certain amount of remorse.
the fact that she still blames me for everything that has happened between the both of us.
I'd like to be given the opportunity to be able to make up for those mistakes,
but if she isn't going to give me that chance, then, well, what can i do?

I won't say that i won't care about her.
I won't say that i won't watch out for her.
In me, i'll still want to be a friend to her.
I'll still care, and i'll still watch out for her.
But anything more than that? i don't know.
we'll see as time goes by.......

God help me, it hurts more and more each and everyday!
I can't take it anymore.........
I can't take the pain anymore.......
i can't live........
i can't do anything.........
I don't feel anything but pain.....
Pure agony, excruciating pain.......
that's all that's left....
pain.........
hurt.........

How can i love again, when my heart's been taken away?
How can i love again, when my soul is dead?
How can i feel again, when i have no heart to feel with?

My life's an endless night....
No star's shining.....
It used to have a sun....
It shone so bright and rought warmth to all.....
It set never to rise again.....

Now i live in and endless night.....
Now i feel nothing but the absence of warth.....
Now i have become nothing.....

I looked into the mirror today.....
I looked into my own eyes.....
All i saw was a cold barren place.....
All i saw was a loveless place.....

I've died, never to rise again.
I'm dead on the inside, never to feel again.
Rest in peace marcus of old.

There will never be another you - Taken off AKA Acappella 4

We were so good together,
I thought we'd last forever,
Then you left me for someone new.
And now my heart's a mess,
I must confess,
I simply don't know what to do.

There maybe many other nights like this,
And i'll be standing here with someone new.
There maybe other songs to sing.
Another fall, another spring,
But there will never be another you. (another you, no one else but you)
There maybe other lips that i may kiss, (how i miss your lips)
But they won't thrill me like yours used to do. (oh how they thrill me babe)
And i may dream a million dreams
But how can they come true.
Cause there will never ever be another you.

And i can dream, a million dreams,
But you know they will never come true,
Cause there will never ever be another you.
Where can i find,
Another you.
(where can i find another you)

Artist: REM
Album: Automatic for the People
Title: Everybody Hurts


When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone,
when you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on.
Don't let yourself go, everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes.

Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it's time to sing along.
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
if you feel like letting go, (hold on)
when you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on.

Everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends.
Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand.
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life, the days and nights are long,
when you think you've had too much of this life to hang on.

Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes.
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on. (repeat & fade)
(Everybody hurts. You are not alone.)

Gonna take a little break from song writing tonight....
Somehow my Sunday's have become the worst day for me.
Its the day when my depression somehow hits me the hardest.
I'm probably fighting a fruitless battle.
I'm uncertain of how she feels for me.
Regardless of how i feel for her.
Nothing i say or do, nothing i feel can warm her heart to me....
She's super cold towards me.... i can't take that....
i can't stand this.... i can't stand all the pain...
i don't mind being ignored.. but being ignored by her is the worst...
Why? cause it hurts the most.....
I write on my blog, the things i cannot say.
the things trapped in me that i have no way of letting loose.....
Yes, this is my weak, my vulnerable side.....
yes this is a chart of all the pain i go through.
also of my joys.. yet with recent times, joy seems to avoid me like the plague.....

I understand teh fact that nothing will ever be the same again.....
I also understand the fact that both of us have changed.......
Still it doesn't stop me from loving her.....
Still it doesn't stop me from wanting her in my life.....

I know i can be scary, the way i think and talk about things.....
I seem to think too far ahead and i know it scared you.....
I'm sorry if it did...... i won't mention anything about it in future......
if it scares you, i'll not say anything.....
I know i can be a too possesive at times....
I know you need your space.....
I'm sorry if i suffocated you or choked you of your freedom....
It won't happen again.... I know these things now.....
I know saying these things now maybe too late, and maybe useless, yet i have to try....
i know i say teh same things over and over again... thats cause i don't know what else to say.....
Say nothing, sure i could just shut up....
If it'll bring you back to me, i'd do anything.....

I doubt you'll ever read this..... I doubt you even surf into my blog anymore...
But on the chance that you ever do.
i just want to tell you.....
I still love you. as much as when i got to know you.
some people say don't love a love that hurts.
but somehow, i just believe that in the end its all going to be worth it.....
I'm sorry for everything, for all the pain, for all the headaches, for all the tears.....
As sorry as i am, i just hope you'll give me a second chance....
to right my wrongs..... a second chance to at least try to make it work again....
i know its been roughly a month..... but i'm still asking the same things....
i hope you'll change your mind someday........
I hope at least you'll start talking to me again......
at least let me know how you feel again.......
at least give me a second chance at life again......
please, i'm begging...........
on my knees, i'm begging..........
i pray that you still feel for me as i feel for you.....
i pray and i beg....... that's all i can do now.......
i pray and i beg, that you will allow me to love you again........
that you will let me show you i've changed.......
that you will tell me what i have to know, so i can change.......
change the way i do things..... that i'll think before i say anything.....
that i'll think of you before i do anything........
but not change the me you fell for so long ago......
he's still here... i'm still here.... just that i need you to pull me back up again.....
please come back....... please change your mind......
please i beg you...... please..................